Permeate my Soul

So I have recently been given this eye opening-soul hurtin read by the wonderful Watchman Nee. I must say....at first it was something that I could kinda relate too, and saw the areas in which my life needed some altering. And it has formed into this soul wrenching....I cry on every page type of read. In this book....Release of the Spirit, Watchman Nee describes us as a three part being, body, soul, and spirit. Usually we live out of our soul, letting things like our mind, will, and emotions govern our every move. But until we let our Spirit move and permeate the soul.....we will never reach the place where we are supposed to be. Now for me....I like to reflect and look back, not to think 'what if' and wonder, but to see if there is fruit. And as I read this book, it seemed that I was living in the soul. Now living in this realm can kinda be deceiving because good things can happen here. You can look like you got it all together, shoot for things that others aren't, and accomplish a lot. But if the Soul is not permeated by the Spirit, His Spirit more importantly we have failed. So I have reached a new low, in that it doesn't matter if my soul wants to free the oppressed, fight for injustice, and will all these good things. If I'm not permeated by HIM....I am lost. Religion kinda screws it up in that....this Maker of All wants simply a prayer. No, He wants to permeate you in such a way, where you get lost in finding you in Him. Total Surrender.