Hesitation from Fear

Hesitation is something that is brought about because of fear....and fear alone. Last night is was my turn to pray and intercede for the other groups out doing bar ministry. So my partner and I found our way on the beach where we decided to sit in the sand so we could focus, away from the loud music and the endless sea of people. As we were lifting up prayers of boldness and wisdom, a girl walked up behind us, who from first glance appeared to be a bar girl. She looked Thai, and was wearing a green tight tank top, and short shorts to say the least. Her demeanor was one of unstableness.... it seemed as if she wanted also to get away from the loud roars of the streets. She stood behind us and acted as if she wanted to talk to someone. Trying to continue to pray...I looked away as if I wasn't paying attention to her need. A good 30 minutes went by and the girl had now moved and sat what seemed like a good ten steps away from where we were sitting. I couldn't pray, I couldn't ask for boldness for others when all I felt was the need to go talk with this girl. I wish I could describe in words the conversations and battles that were taking place in my head.....Do I go talk with her? Or do I stay? A wave of hesitation took hold, and I just waited. And waited. And waited. 

At what seemed like forever, my partner looked at me and asked, "What are you thinking Gab?", and I looked at her and said, "I'm supposed to talk to that girl." At that point she was feeling the same thing. So we decided right then and there to get up and move the ten steps over to talk with this mysterious girl. As we were grabbing our shoes, two men approached this lonely girl who was sitting in the dark. They began to start a conversation which eventually led to them wanting to buy her for the night. Frustration began to pour out of me in the form of tears, because I was supposed to talk to that girl, but I waited. Fear and hesitation took over me and I had missed my opportunity. I was praying for boldness and yet I did not possess that very quality. I wanted so much to walk over and tell those guys off, or grab her by the arm and just run away from those men. But I couldn't. We eventually moved from that spot and watched from a distance. Praying and hoping she would just get up and walk away. We had to meet up with our group, so we left not knowing what happened to that mysterious girl in the green tank top. But I tell this story in hopes that you don't let fear cause you to hesitate. Seeing a girl being bought is something that I have come to see very often, but seeing a girl being bought when I was supposed to intercede is a different feeling all in itself. Fear is something that is crippling and hindering people from doing the work Christ intended us to do. So this day....what is making you hesitate from doing what you were created for? Is it fear? Pride? Whatever it may be...opportunities are slipping by us, and the world is staying the same. Don't let hesitations run your life, because you will always think, what if and I wonder. Live life with Boldness and take the ten steps over to change someones life.